Lessons on Communication from Job

 

https://www.latimes.com/opinion/op-ed/la-xpm-2013-apr-07-la-oe-0407-silk-ring-theory-20130407-story.html

Rev. Molly F. James, Ph.D.

DFMS Noonday Prayer

Psalm 122; Job 5:8-9, 20-27; John 16:33–17:5

Commemoration of Conrad Weiser 

July 13, 2023

May God’s Word be spoken. May God’s Word be heard. May that point us to the living Word who is Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen. 

So today we commemorate Conrad Weiser, who was a peacebuilder between Pennsylvania settlers and the Indigenous People, particularly the Mohawk and Iroquoi. He had a gift for facilitating communication across difference. So much so that when he died, an Iroquois man said, “We are at a great loss and sit in darkness ... as since his death we cannot so well understand one another.”  And relations between British colonists and the Iroquois deteriorated after his death. 

I find it amusing that our OT reading is from Job. While the passage we just read is okay on its own, as it emphasizes that we can trust in God. This passage in its wider context is much more problematic. Here’s a refresher, in case you haven’t read Job lately. God makes a bet with Satan to test Job’s faithfulness. He sends all kinds of tribulations Job’s way - he loses family members, livestock, property, and has no end of physical suffering. In the midst of it, his friends come to see him and offer pastoral support. Although, I am very glad that Job’s friends never came to visit me in the hospital. While they are correct to affirm God’s goodness and righteousness, the only way they have to explain suffering is that Job must have done something very wrong to deserve so much pain and suffering. So basically they have come to see Job to find why he screwed up and to affirm their own superiority. 

Think of how it would feel in the midst of great loss and personal suffering to have people come to see what you did to cause it?  In the midst of great suffering, I am not sure we even want to hear a lot of sermons about how righteous God is or how everything happens for a reason. We don’t need platitudes or all those unhelpful things people say. I am sure we have all had the experience in the midst of our own suffering when we find ourselves having to comfort someone who has come to see us, because it is clear that our suffering is causing them great anxiety. I lost count of the number of people who told me about their relatives who died from cancer upon learning my diagnosis. I know they were trying to make a connection, but it was really not helpful to be reminded that I had a life threatening illness. 

So I find it intriguing that on a day when we are commemorating someone whose gifts for communicating across differences supported peace in Colonial America, we read from Scripture’s most profound lesson about how not to show up when your friend is suffering. 

What are we supposed to remember and take away on this day? I think it is the importance of communication and humility. We need to honor each other’s differences and never assume we have all the answers. If someone we love is suffering, don’t try to explain it. If you are not sure what to say, just be present. Knowing we are not alone in suffering means more than all the theological treatises we could ever read. Incarnate God’s presence. Affirm the truth that we are beloved and will never be alone. 

And don’t bring them your anxiety. If you are not familiar with the idea, I commend to you the concept of the ring theory (see picture above), which I first encountered in an opinion piece in the LA Times (https://www.latimes.com/opinion/op-ed/la-xpm-2013-apr-07-la-oe-0407-silk-ring-theory-20130407-story.html). 

Wherever you find yourself in the circle, you are only allowed to dump out. Never in. 

If only someone had drawn this diagram for Job’s friends. Fortunately, we have it, and we have countless good examples of listening and being present in Scripture, in history, and in our own lives. So we can follow in the footsteps of the women at the cross and be steadfast and present whenever someone we love needs us. God is with us always. May we live and act in ways that always point to that truth. AMEN. 

Fear Not

Rev. Molly F. James, PhD

DFMS Noonday Prayer via Zoom

St. Michael and All Angels, September 29, 2020

May God’s Word be spoken. May God’s Word be heard. May that point us to the living Word who is Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen. 

Today is the feast of St. Michael and All Angels, and so of course we get readings about angels. I am particularly intrigued by our reading from Job. I must say this reading comes from my favorite part of Job.  I love God’s answer to Job out of the whirlwind.  Of course, it does leave one feeling rather small since God basically says “Who do YOU think you are? Where were WE when God created the world?” Ultimately I find it comforting because it is a passage that reminds us that we are NOT in charge - God is.  But I digress . . . today is about angels.  And although this is one of my favorite passages, I have not paid much attention to the angels in the passage.  Yet of course they should be there - the heavenly chorus on the sidelines shouting for joy and singing God’s praises. And that is certainly a part of the job description of being an angel - when we celebrate the Eucharist we join with Angels and Archangels in praising God - yet it is important for us to remember that being an angel is about more than singing God’s praises. They are not background figures.  In fact it is somewhat surprising that on this feast day we don’t get readings that have angels as the central characters - doing what they do best - being messengers for God. 

Our Gospel text is not as cheery as Job - we have a prophecy of the end times, and things are, literally, quite dark.  We are reminded that in fact angels can actually be quite scary figures. We often hear talk about angels as though they are so nice - always joyful like in our passage from Job - and Hollywood usually portrays them as the polar opposite of the devil. But we should remember that in Scripture passages where an angel is a messenger, the first words out of the angel’s mouth are usually “Fear not.”  The fact that they have to say that is probably a pretty good indication of how terrified the people’s faces were.

For those of you have experience being a hospital chaplain, you can probably commiserate with the angels.  So often in the hospital when someone realizes you are the chaplain, their faces get that look - the look of sheer terror.  They assume you are there to deliver bad news and that you most certainly know something they don’t.  When I worked as a chaplain, I found I often couldn’t get the words out fast enough to explain that no, I was not the angel of death, no, I did not know something they didn’t and really I was just there to be helpful and supportive.  

Actually I think all of us can relate to the angels in a way.  We are all, by virtue of our baptism, called to praise God and to share God’s message with the world. And I think in this particular time we need the message of the angels, and the message of our Scriptures today. Job reminds us that it is not all up to us. In fact, very little is up to us. We are not in charge. There is far more to the world than we can see or know. So in those moments when we feel overwhelmed trying to do all the things, then we can pause, we can think of Job. We can think of God’s admonition, “Where were you when I laid the foundations of the earth?” Not as a critique, not as more admonition of our shortcomings, but as a statement of fact meant to reassure us that this whole thing is a lot bigger than whatever we are fretting about in the current moment. If God can lay the foundations of the earth, then it is probably pretty likely that God could help us solve our current difficulty too, if only we would get off our high horse and stop thinking we had to do it all ourselves. 

We also need that message of the angels. We need to be reminded to “Fear not.” Oh my friends, it would be so easy to get caught in a cycle of fear right now. There are so many news headlines that would help us do that. But nothing will be served by filling our hearts and our heads with fear and anxiety. Like we are taught as hospital chaplains, it is our job to be the non anxious presence in the room. The fear and anxiety is all around us. No doubt we have people around us or with whom we are in regular contact who could use that message: “Fear not.” The world needs that message right now. 

So let us ground ourselves in that Truth. Let us do whatever it is that we need to do to hold on to that truth in the midst of the challenges we face. Whatever we need to be able to carry that truth and share it with others. Perhaps we need a picture of St. Michael or Gabriel or another favorite angel. Perhaps we need to keep God’s question to Job on a sticky note near our computer to be reminded that we are not responsible for the entirety of creation. Or perhaps today is the day we need to hear the message anew, so we just need to call our own angels, those people in our lives who incarnate God’s love for us and whose voices can always speak the truth so we hear it. We call them. so they can say to us, “Fear not.”

Whatever practices or tools we might need, let us hold fast to the assurance of the angels. God is here. God is with us. We need not be afraid. Not today. Not ever. 

AMEN.